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Twelve Step Recovery  Workshop                  P.O. Box  26145 Baltimore, MD 21210                       410-880-2439         

Struggling with Food,  and Myself - Joan's personal story

I am a 41 year-old woman. I am a recovering anorexic, compulsive overeater and co-dependent.  I grew up in a family of five children. My dad was physically and psychologically abusive. I learned from an early age how to control his anger. My "friends" were books, animals, and the drawings I did.

As is often the case with anorexics, I was a straight "A" student. Although there had always been problems with overeating and co-dependence, my life spiraled downward in college. I tried recovering in Overeaters Anonymous, but instead I became anorexic, fearful, withdrawn, and sullen. Looking back on it, I think that I had not taken a 1^st Step. Although my major was art, I lost interest in it and eventually returned to my parent’s home, fearful and convinced I could not support myself.

At that point, I met some people who were really working the Twelve Steps. I saw the difference it had made in their life and began to believe my life could change too. I worked the steps and experienced a new life. I won a fellowship to study abroad. Unfortunately, while there, I relapsed. Even after coming back, I could not get abstinent with food and suffered terribly from co-dependence and self-hate. I held a series of low-level jobs and was getting fired constantly. I was totally confused about religion and felt rudderless.

When I finally turned to God in a real way, instead of turning to other people, I got better. I have been in recovery about 11 years. I am sane around food. I have a career that I enjoy and am secure in. I do a good job. I have an art career, which is blossoming. I have an excellent and loving relationship with my 12 year-old son, and a good marriage. I have gone through several serious life trials. I am a member of a church I love, where I speak honestly about what I believe. In many areas of my life, I am looked upon as a leader. My health is good, and I genuinely enjoy my life.

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